| |
| Part I |
1 | Jared A. |
Hansen | 16 year-old football & basketball player. Deceased.
Aka: Jare. |
| Cheryl |
Anderson | One of Jared's sexual partners. |
2 | Karen Ann |
McNeil | Richard's girlfriend. Valium addict. Currently in coma.
Aka: Kare. |
| Richard |
Doorland | Karen's boyfriend. Best talker of group.
Football player. |
| Wendy |
Chernin | In love with Jared. A swimmer and choir member. |
| Pam |
Sinclair | A glamour vixen. Aka: Pamie. |
| Hamilton |
Reese | Jared's friend. aka: Mr. Hefton |
| Donna |
Kilbruck | A girl with walrus-crotch. |
3 | Albert |
Linus | The poor and quiet kid. A member of Photography Club. |
| Lois |
McNeil | Karen's mother who's obsessed with owls. |
4 | Dr. |
Menger | Karen's doctor. |
| George |
McNeil | Karen's father. |
| Eileen |
| Richard's cousin. |
| Philip |
Eng | Richard's English classmate. |
| Scott |
Litman | Richard's English classmate. |
| Andrea |
Porter | Richard's English classmate. |
5 | Susan |
| The girl who loves to eat at Wendy's. |
| Donald |
| Basketball Varsity Player. |
| Norman |
| The guy who's vain in his Varsity sweater. |
| Gillian |
| Broke her arm on Spring Retreat. |
| Brian |
| A car nut. |
| Sue |
| A girl who wants to live in Hawaii. |
| Noreen |
| A girl who wants to live in Europe. |
| Don |
| A boy who wants to make a million and be a ski bum. |
| Gordon |
| A boy who wants to be a Radio DJ in Australia. |
| Eggie |
| Nickname of Karen's car. |
| Scott |
Pelps | Pam's archenemy. Secretly adored Hamilton from afar. |
6 | Mr. |
Philips | A manic-depressive wife beater. |
| Mrs. |
Owen | Has a liver disease. |
| Mr. |
Pulaski | Perved his own kid. |
7 | Carol |
Doorland | Richard's mother. |
| Megan Karen |
McNeil | Richard and Karen's daughter. |
8 | Kevin |
| Richard's decision maker. |
9 | Klaus |
| Pam's new beefy play-thing. |
| Rick |
| A not-so talented photographer. |
| Charlie |
| Richard's golden labrador. |
10 | Cleo |
| A hiker. Hamilton's wife. |
12 | Tina |
Lowry | Richard's old classmate. |
| Scott (1) |
| A production guy in Los Angeles. |
| Jenny |
Tyrell | Megan's friend. |
| Skitter |
| Megan's up-to-no-good boyfriend. |
14 | Hillary |
Markham | A prop lady living near Cleveland Dam. |
| Scott (2) |
| Richard's old high school friend. An actor of the coach character. |
| Barton |
| Richard's co-worker. |
| Mrs. |
Kitchen | Hamilton's neighbor who lives in Unit 403. |
| Dawn |
| Hamilton's next door neighbor. |
| Mr. |
Huong | Hamilton's neighbor who lives in Suite 508. |
| |
| Part II |
15 | Teddy |
Liu | Pam and Hamilton's friend. |
| Tracy |
| Pam and Hamilton's friend. |
| China |
White | Overdosed at a Halloween Party. |
17 | Cindy |
Webber | Hamilton's computer date. |
| Raymond |
Merlis | Karen's computer date. |
| Keith |
| The single hair growing in the mole of Raymond's face. |
20 | Gloria |
| The TV show host. |
| Paula |
| Pre-interviewer of the TV show. |
| Randy |
| Woman arguing with Gloria. |
| Jason |
| Gloria's assistant. |
21 | Mr. |
Lennox | Richard's neighbor. |
22 | Captain |
Dunphy | Richard's neighbor in West Vancouver. |
| Jerry |
Dunphy | Captain Dunphy's brother. |
| Mrs. |
Dunphy | Captain Dunphy's wife. |
23 | Ellaine |
Bucanan | Lois's neighbor. |
| Gareth |
| An actor who is dead on taping. |
| Dorrie |
| The production assistant. |
| Sandra |
| Catering server. A plump forty-ish woman who was found dead. |
| Don |
| The director. |
| Randy |
| Skitter's car-fixing friend. |
| Scott (3) |
| Skitter's car-fixing friend. |
| |
| Part III |
27 | Brian |
Alwin | Jared's classmate from tenth grade. |
| Stacey |
Klaasen | A girl Jared slept with. |
| Jennifer |
Banks | A girl Jared slept with. |
| Annabel |
Freed | A girl Jared slept with. |
| Dee-An |
Walsh | A girl Jared slept with. |
| Jane |
| Megan's daughter. |
28 | Mr. |
Tyrell | Jenny's father. |
| Mrs. |
Tyrell | Jenny's mother. |
34 | Linda |
Jermyn | An old classmate of the group. |