| | | Part One |
| Pres. | Eisenhower | The current U.S. President. |
| Vice Pres. | Nixon | The Vice President. |
| Dolores | Price | Narrator and Protagonist. |
| LuAnn | Masicotte | Tony's boss. A rich widow. |
| Cookie | | The clerk at the package store. |
| Mr. | Weiss | A man who bought the land of Tony's parents. |
| Anthony | Price | Dolores's father. Aka: Tony. |
| Zahra | | Mrs. Masicotte's fat dog. |
| Mrs. | Nelkin | Dolores's teacher. |
| Mr. | Horvak | The school janitor. |
| Thelma | Holland | Dolores's grandmother. Bernice's mother. Aka: Grandma Holland. |
| Anthony | Price Jr. | Dolores's dead baby brother. |
| Howard | Hanchin | Dolores's school seatmate. |
| Jeanette | Nord | Dolores's new bestfriend. |
| Samson | | Jeanette's cat. |
| Delilah | | Jeanette's cat. |
| Mr. | Nord | Jeanette's father. |
| Mrs. | Nord | Jeanette's mother. |
| Petey | | Bernice's parakeet. |
| Mrs. | Hatheway | Dolores's pregnant teacher. |
| Mr. | Douville | The Prices's next door neighbor. |
| Mrs. | Douville | Mr. Douville's wife. |
| Geneva | Sweet | Bernice's friend. |
| Eddie | Holland | Dolores's dead uncle. Bernice younger brother. |
| Kitty | Coffey | Jeanette's friend. |
| Donna | | Tony's new girlfriend. |
| Bernice Marie | Holland-Price | Dolores's mother. |
| Mrs. | Tingley | Grandma Holland's third-floor tenant. |
| Roberta | Jaskiewicz | Dolores's new friend. Owner of a tattoo shop. Aka: Roby. |
| Connie | | Owner of a Superette. |
| Big | Boy | The butcher. Connie's nephew. |
| Rosalie | Pysyk | Stacia's twin. A girl who dislikes Dolores. |
| Stacia | Pysyk | Rosalie's twin. A girl who dislikes Dolores. |
| Sandra | Lilly | Dolores's teacher. |
| Margaret | Frances | The school principal. |
| Father | Duptulski | The priest. |
| Ringo | Starr | A musician. |
| Dianne | Lennon | A vocalizer. |
| Liam | Phipps | Dolores's classmate. |
| Kathy | Mahoney | Dolores's classmate. The class president. |
| Walter | Knupp | Dolores's classmate. |
| Leon | | Roberta's tattoo client. |
| The | Canuck | Roberta's 2nd husband. |
| Mario | Zito | Bernice's new lover. Aka: Iggy. |
| Jack | Speight | Rita's husband. The man who raped Dolores. |
| Rita | Speight | Jack's wife. The new tenant of Grandma Holland. |
| Judy | Mumphy | Grandma Holland's church friend. |
| Dolores | Del Rio | A Mexican actress. |
| Sister | Presentation | One of the teachers at St. Anthony School. Dolores's teacher. |
| Norma | French | Dolores's new friend at St. Anthony School. |
| Kenny | | Norma's boyfriend. |
| | | Part Two |
| Fabio | Pucci | Dolores's counselor at Easterly High. Aka: Uncle Fabio. |
| Senorita | O'Brien | Dolores's Spanish teacher at Easterly High. |
| Mr. | McRae | Dolores's tutor. |
| Mrs. | Dunkel | Dolores's tutor. |
| Dr. | Hancock | Dolores's psychiatrist. |
| Tricia | Nixon | The U.S. President's daughter. |
| Dr. | Phinny | Grandma Holland's acquaintance. |
| Bob | Eubanks | The game show host of "The Newlywed Game". |
| Mr. | Frechette | Dolores's physiology teacher. |
| Katherine | Strednicki | Dolores's college roommate. Aka: Kippy. |
| Dante | Davis | Kippy's boyfriend. Dolores's husband. |
| Mrs. | Bronstein | Dolores's 3rd year English teacher at Easterly High. |
| Irving | Sweet | Geneva's husband. |
| Derek | | Dolores's non-existent boyfriend. |
| Arthur | Music | A man who accidentaly kills Bernice. |
| Ingrid | Gulp | A fat history teacher at Easterly High. Aka: Bertha Butt. |
| Gary | | Mr. Pucci's roommate. |
| Larry | Rosenfarb | Put wallpaper in Grandma
Holland's house. Dolores's friend. |
| Ruth | Rosenfarb | Larry's wife. |
| Tia | Rosenfarb | Larry and Ruth's baby. |
| Ida | Brock | Old woman. |
| Dottie | | Dolores's new lesbian friend and lover. |
| Rochelle | | The dorm's president. |
| Joe | Strednicki | An electrician. |
| Bambi | | Dolores's dorm mate. |
| Tammy | | Dolores's dorm mate. |
| Veronica | | Dolores's dorm mate. |
| Naomi | | Dolores's dorm mate. |
| Eric | | A culinary student. Kippy's boyfriend. |
| Stormy | Laterra | Dolores's former classmate. |
| George | Chakiris | Dolores's former classmate. |
| Dr. | Lu | Dolores's history class teacher at Merton College. |
| Marcia | | Avon representative. An officer in Dolores's dorm. |
| Joni | Mitchell | Dolores's dorm mate. |
| Zach | | Naomi's boyfriend. |
| Michael | | Dottie's dead son. |
| Mrs. | Nelkin | Dolores's former teacher. |
| Mrs. | Rickenbaker | One of Dolore's college teachers. |
| Mr. | LaRose | The principal at Merton College. |
| Domingos | | Dolores's driver. |
| Augusto | | Domingo's cousin. |
| Brian | Sweet | Geneva and Irving's son. |
| | | Part Three |
| Dr. | Shaw | Dolores's third psychotherapist at the mental hospital. |
| Dr. | Netler | Dolores's first psychotherapist at the mental hospital. |
| Dr. | Pragnesh | One of Dolores's psychotherapist at the mental hospital. |
| Manny | | Dolores's co-patient at hospital. Aka: The Masturbator. |
| Lilian | | Dolores's co-patient at the mental hospital. |
| Evelyn | | The night supervisor at the mental hospital. |
| Depolito | | Dolores's nurse. |
| Mrs. | Ropiek | Dolores's nurse. |
| Anita | | Dolores's housemate at Project Outreach House. |
| Fred | Burden | Dolores's housemate at Project Outreach House. |
| Mrs. | Shea | Dolores's housemate at Project Outreach House. |
| Rose Mary | Woods | President Nixon's secretary. |
| J.J | Fickett | A man who likes to photograph coffins. |
| Mrs. | Fickett | Mr. Fickett's wife. |
| Nadine | | Dolores's psychic. |
| Eddie | Ann | The girl who had a crush on Dante. |
| Jolene | Burden | Fred's sister. |
| Marguerite | Wing | Dolores's landlady. Chadley's live-in-partner. |
| Chadley | Massey | Dolores's landlord. |
| Mrs. | Lagatutta | One of Chadley's tenants. A nurse. |
| Henry | Wing | Marguerite's dead husband. |
| Tandy | | A cashier. Dolores's co-worker. |
| Rusty | | Tandy's fiance. |
| Fanny | | Dolores's co-worker and friend. |
| Boomer | | Dante's co-teacher. |
| Paula | | Boomer's wife. |
| Rafaela | | Dante's ex-girlfriend. |
| Vita | Marie | Dante and Dolores's unborn baby. |
| Nick | | Dante's friend. |
| Ernest | Holland | Dolores's grandfather. |
| Ashley | | Boomer and Paula's daughter. |
| Mr. | Lamoreaux | The assistant manager at Grand Union. |
| Ev | | Dante's friend. |
| Sheila | | Dante's student and girlfriend. |
| Mr. | Buchbinder | Dolores's employer who paid her tuition fee. |
| Bea | Gutwax | Dolores's boss. A bake shop owner. |
| Ronnie | Gutwax | Mrs. Gutwax's son. |
| Jacqueline | Price | Dolores's step-mother. |
| Janice | | Dante's girlfriend. |
| William | | Dolores's goldfish. |
| Kathleen | | Dolores's goldfish. |
| Johnny | Wu | Owner of China Paradise. |
| Teddy | | Roberta's driver. |
| Allyson | | A night class student at Dolores's school. |
| Roy | | Dolores's teacher. |
| Shiva | | Allyson's baby boy. |
| Thayer | Kitchen | Dolores's classmate in her night class. A widowed man. |
| Claudia | Kitchen | Thayer's wife. Jemal's mother. |
| Ida | Buchbinder | Mr. Buchbinder's wife. |
| Jemal | Kitchen | Thayer's son. Aka: Chilly J. |
| Annette | Kitchen | Thayer's sister. |
| Steve | | Thayer's gay friend. |
| Dennis | | Thayer's gay friend. |
| Ron | | Thayer's gay friend. |
| Robert | | Thayer's gay friend. |
| Lefty | | Thayer's gay friend. |
| Dr. | Bulanhagui | Thayer and Dolores's doctor. |