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- A Well-Behaved Woman
opens with this
compelling passage: "When they asked about the Vanderbilts and the
Belmonts, about their celebrations and depredations…when they asked
why she did the extreme things she’d done, Alva said it all began
quite simply: Once there was a desperate young woman whose mother
was dead and whose father was dying almost as quickly as his money
was running out….She was twenty-one years old, ripened unpicked
fruit rotting on the branch." (3) How would you characterize Alva’s
circumstances at the start of the novel and as her story goes on?
How does she begin to flourish?
- The author’s descriptions of tenement life in lower Manhattan
are especially vivid and heartbreaking. Would you consider the city
and surrounding environs a character in the novel? How does the
setting—a budding New York City becoming a world-class capital for
art, architecture, and society, and a hub for all walks of
life—enhance the drama on the page?
- How do Alva’s increasingly dire circumstances change once she
has married into the Vanderbilts family? Do these changes alter her
essential nature or character? Does she stay devout to her sense of
ethics or empathy?
- What are marriage markets and debuts, and how do these elaborate
presentations work out for the women of the novel? For Alva,
Consuelo Yznaga, or any of Alva’s young sisters or daughter? How
much choice do these young women have to participate in finding an
attractive suitor, and what risks do they face?
- "Money was no fix for that girl, true—But please, God, she
thought, let it be for me." (8) What freedom does money buy
for women in this generation? Do the trappings of wealth justify the
opportunity to escape a place like Five Points?
- "Love was a frivolous emotion, certainly no basis for a
marriage—every young lady knew this. You must always put sense
over feeling." (24) Is Alva content with her choice to marry
William at his proposal? How does she justify this decision? Does it
matter if there is no love in a marriage? Or can love grow in such
conditions?
- What gives Alva her confidence and courage? Is it rooted in her
privileged birth and experiences, in continued access to the best
life has to offer? How does adversity—personal and
societal—challenge and invigorate her?
- Alva and her upper-class contemporaries are seemingly, and not
uncommonly, in the dark about the most basic functions of their
physical bodies. How have things changed for women in the last
century and a half—and how do we share information about such core
experiences as sexuality, pregnancy, childbirth, and aging? How has
this change in knowledge-sharing, care, and education improved our
lives? Have cultural attitudes shifted when it comes to perceptions
of female sensuality and a wife’s "duty?"
- "Whatever he believed was correct in regard to her keeping, he
could enact." (75) This is the chilling thought Alva has on her
wedding day when she considers the kinds of power her new husband
will have over her. Not exclusive to women of wealth, this kind of
male privilege affected women of all social classes. How does Alva
test and successfully reshape this power and control?
- "After all, by connecting him securely to the Vanderbilts, he
would profit as much as she. It was a business arrangement." (61)
Here the New York social scene is a world built on alliances. Who
succeeds in such a setting? How does Ward McAllister make his mark
and thrive? Who orchestrates these rigid society-life rules?
- What is Alva’s take on the "old money" versus "new money"
conflict? How are the two worlds described in the novel and what
defines them? Is "new money" gauche? How do the nouveaux riches
behave generally and what resistance awaits them from the "old
money" types?
- How does Alva rebel within her role as societal and charitable
maven at the helm of one of America’s most powerful dynasties? As a
woman in 1880s New York City, what does she shake up and which
principles and duties does she adhere to? Is Alva "the well-behaved
woman" of the book’s title? Discuss.
- "He had his hand on her collarbone now and was saying, ‘why
would you want to be bothered with all that political nonsense?
What’s wrong with simply enjoying being a lady of privilege?’" "‘Ask
your sisters. They want more, too.’" (138) How did you feel reading
passages like the one quoted here? Inspiration, admiration,
camaraderie? Something else? What is at stake for Alva when she
campaigns for suffrage and other social movements? What promise did
social change hold for her?
- What does Oliver Belmont represent to Alva, and does that change
over time? Why does Alva initially reject her feelings—is it all
strategic?
- Why does Alva ignore the gossip about her husband’s infidelities
in the course of their marriage? What changes?
- "‘I’m going to make the most of it, Mary. All of it. I’m going
to beat society at its own game.’" (151) Does Alva succeed with this
bold assertion? What does the grand house on Fifth Avenue come to
symbolize for her at its building (and then well into her marriage)?
How does Alva leave her mark on the Vanderbilt name, New York
society, and the lives around her? How does she reinvent herself and
the literal landscape of the city?
- Compare Alva’s attitudes and passions in life to those of her
sister-in-law Alice. Though both women are immensely wealthy and
socially influential, how differently do each of them choose to
wield their power? In what ways do they diverge?
- "They and their friends existed on a joyous merry-go-round of
wealth." (202) How would you characterize the lives and fancies of
the wealthiest families at the turn of the 20th century? How do they
spend their days and fortunes? What marks their privilege—and does
this privilege extend beyond their material belongings to their
seemingly-no-consequences-behavior? Discuss the boating accident
scene.
- Why does Alva choose to confess her secret desire for Oliver to
Lady Consuelo? Aside from deepening the intimacy of their
friendship, does the revelation open new avenues of trouble for
them? What, if anything, might have been different had Alva kept
this truth to herself?
- How does Alva direct her daughter Consuelo’s marriage prospects?
What risks does she warn her daughter of and how does she choose to
educate her? Given her own experiences, why doesn’t Alva encourage a
marriage based on love? Do you agree with her guidance?
- "The cost of any and all of it was merely money, and he had more
of that than he could ever spend." (284) Is it hard to imagine
having this kind of extreme existence and wealth? Do you think this
untouchable status would influence the decisions you’d make? Do
money and power corrupt? Was Alva immune to it?
- "An intelligent woman in this world takes her chances where she
finds them." (170) What are those chances for Alva? What about for
you personally?
- Does Consuelo Yznaga’s plight make her a sympathetic character?
How does her lifelong friendship and intimacy with the Vanderbilts
shape the arc of the story? Could you forgive her shocking betrayal,
as Alva considers on the final page? Why or why not?
- "‘Miss Harper likened you to an ox. She said sometimes you just
put your head down and push until you get where you wish to be.’"
(295) Alva was unequivocally a woman of action. Would you call her
shrewd or brilliant, ahead of her time? Does she remind you of any
change makers, in or out of the public eye?
- "‘My entire life, Consuelo. That’s how long women have been
patiently speaking on this subject to one another and to the men in
charge—who take advantage of our habits of being polite and
cooperative while censuring every opposite behavior. Men only
respect power. So we must be powerful.’" (381) How does this advice
resonate with you as a modern reader?
- Were you inspired to dive deeper into the lives, lavish
residences, and artifacts of the Vanderbilt and Belmont families
while reading this book? How does the author’s note at the end of
the book help orient you with what was crafted by the author’s
imagination and what elements were factual? Were you surprised by
any findings?
- What would you wish for Alva—or Consuelo Yznaga—if their stories
continued on after the last page?
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